Fat People and Politicians Shouldn't Wear Thongs!!!

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Alaska Chronicle - December 2007

Fat People and Politicians Shouldn't Wear Thongs!!!

December 11th 2007 21:48

Category: No Category

Really, I love people, especially those winsome souls that have a wholesome sense of self. Women, fascinate me with their oft times quirky behavior and odd speech patterns. There really is a difference between, "man speak and woman speak" to borrow a quaint expression from the 60's. However, there are some 'generally understood' universal rules of decorum; some folks aught not to wear spandex, few can spit gracefully, farting individuals will be ostracized, flogged or both, and fat folks shouldn't wear thong anythings.

That goes for the loverly lass above and the retched vision below. This person must be trolling for, what? Attention or a, "jimmy jammer" among the white house interns? The San Fransico gay pride parade is over and what's left; "Hi honey, I'm home and wow, it's hot outside." Guys, look at your thong laced butt in a mirror and convince me that you really want your daughter, wife, mother, 'friend' or mistress to see you dressed in this "outing costume." No one can be so self delusional as to believe that this looks attractive, fetching, appealing or whatever. Give the world and beaches at large a break, go home and change into a one piece that doesn't disappear into your hinderland region. Especially that Chappaquiddick fella, Ed somebody, who hangs with the other congressional wannabies.

So, what's the leading cause of the thong epiphenomena? Egos that are as over inflated as Bill Clinton's head was during the sexcapades that made up the bulk of his term in office as a setting president, and ice cream; copious amounts of Rocky Road, full bang on triple calorie laden real fat saturated dairy cream based Ambrosia. You stick a hawg or a Clinton in a pen and over fill its feeding trough, it gets fat or impregnates the staff; take away the feeding trough, it gets anorexic and sterile if you get to carried away with not feeding it. Humans don't usually live in pig pens, we live in condo sties, where we have access to copious amount of Ambrosia and unfettered access to other culinary delights, without any constraints. Not even that inner voice we call the conscience missing from the gene pool of most modern politicians and the massive thong wearing miscreant zombies that vote for them.

The cure, we feed the whole lot of them, the conscienceless politicians, fat spandex abusing women, lascivious old fat men wearing thongs, and those ultra skinny wretches that eat like horses and never ...oooh, wait, that's for another blog, to the gotcha gators.

I say the lass with the double tweaky cheeks had better watch her, ummm, bum for the next few weeks. Tough as that job might be, it'd certainly beat watching the nonstop @#$%! political updates for the next few months, oh, and their recaps can kiss my expansive grits as well!

Raven

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Comments

13 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Damo

December 12th 2007 00:34

For the Sake of Argument
My Apologetics

tear out my eyes, tear out my eyes.

Comment by tlcorbin

December 12th 2007 01:53

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..uh, OK, but it may sting a little Damo. Raven

Comment by Lilla

December 12th 2007 01:58

Enviro Warrior
An Extra Ordinary Life
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Raven,

Personally, I think the thong should be registered as sexual harrasment, no matter what size your but is... but that's just me.

Lilla ...

Comment by Damo

December 12th 2007 02:22

For the Sake of Argument
My Apologetics

Hey I am a fan but on the right butt.

Comment by tlcorbin

December 12th 2007 03:19

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Alaska Chronicle

Lilla it should be registered as a deadly weapon and have warning labels, then reported as sexually harrassing.

Oh, yeah, right- you may be correct about that Damo, not that I'd admit to it in front of Tisha or anything.

Raven

Comment by katyzzz

December 12th 2007 06:43

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That's not a self portrait is it? Show and Tell time, it seems. What lovely pictures you have there. Bottom's up!

Comment by katyzzz

December 12th 2007 06:44

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Are you suggesting they don't wear anything?

Comment by tlcorbin

December 12th 2007 14:58

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Alaska Chronicle

Hi katyzzz, good grief - no way is that a self portrait, I have a flat bloggers butt and untanned calves. Tisha accused me of the same thing oddly enough, and was laughing hysterically, she's worrying me.

Actually, I wasn't suggesting that

..they don't wear anything?

Although, a part of me may have had a hidden agenda, the thrust of my focus was a tease about the first models double cheek line bottom; as an artist, that popped into my field of vision immediately.

Yeah, that's right, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Raven

Comment by tlcorbin

December 12th 2007 15:11

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Alaska Chronicle

To All, as usual, this blog is a double pronged blog, part is concerned with the obvious and the remaining focus is aimed at the never ending political antics, which I find exhausting and noxious.

I may or may not be as perverse as I could be with concerted effort.

Raven

Comment by katyzzz

December 15th 2007 04:22

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I suspect you've got a few of those stories up your sleeve.

Comment by tlcorbin

December 15th 2007 06:49

Coffee Quip
A Global Citizen
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Alaska Chronicle

heheheheh, ...mebbe katyzzz, just mebbe. Raven

Comment by secretwritersbusiness

January 16th 2008 23:25

Aw Raven, what's wrong with those lovely butts with the thongs? Isn't it a little 'Western standard of beauty' of us to say 'this ain't pretty?' In Africa, those big bottomed girls would be regarded as models of beauty with the rich abundance of butt-flesh.
I have no qualms about others parading their large/old/wrinkly/disabled/ha iry or whatever parts they like as long as they don't mind me parading mine (not that I do - the thing about thongs is how bloody uncomfortable they are... don't get them at all).
I kinda like the quirk in us all. Far more attractive to me than anorexic models in bathing suits - YUUUCK.
Jo

Comment by tlcorbin

January 17th 2008 00:51

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Alaska Chronicle

Oh great, thanks for that dose of reality Jo, hahahaha, anorexia in thongs, arf.

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